July 29th 2021 Today I had my second dose of the covid vaccine and after I was done and had driven home, I couldn’t get out of the car. You see, I had become magnetised. The vaccine had turned my blood cells into tiny tiny magnets, and my body was stuck to the steel frame of my Ford Fiesta. Or, at least, that’s how this blog would have begun if I was a fucking crazy person conspiracy theorist. Is “crazy person conspiracy theorist” a tautology? Yes. I learnt today that there are genuinely people on this planet who believe that … Continue reading Magnetised


July 28th 2021 Today I almost went for a run. And by that I mean, I was invited to go for one but chose not to. Still, that’s progress. I considered it for at least 3 seconds before deciding not to go. But I took ten minutes to reply to the message just to give the appearance of seriously considering it. I’ll get there. The jo will return to my mo. I just don’t do things by halfs. I either don’t do anything at all (pros: preferable most of the time, no effort. cons: kinda depressing) or go full on … Continue reading Considered


July 27th 2021 Today the Dreamy Vibes Spotify playlist is going on in an attempt to help me sleep. I’m in a bad cycle of late nights which lead to late mornings which lead to late nights which lead to late mornings. Last night I tried to aid that by listening to some music to fall asleep. I told Google (my Google Home mini) to play some Bon Iver, and she did, and I fell asleep okay, but then I woke up when that song with Taylor Swift came on. I assume I woke up because I was confused as … Continue reading Dreamy


July 26th 2021 Today I got irrationally angry and threw a cup in the sink. I’m not an angry person, really. I get sad, or morose, or introspective, or sarcastic, but I don’t tend to get outright angry. So what caused my sudden outburst? Well, tiredness probably. But also my coffee machine. It spurted air out unexpectedly and sprayed ground coffee all over the kitchen side. That was it, really. So I threw my cup at the sink. Dunno why. Seems daft now I think about it. I even followed it up by slapping the tap. I don’t know in … Continue reading Angry


July 25th 2021 Today we had a family barbecue for the first time in what feels like years. It probably feels like years because it has been years. That is how time works. Grandad seems worse. He has Alzheimer’s, and maybe it’s just because I’ve not seen him in a while, or maybe he’s just not used to being around people, but it seemed worse today. He asked me 6 times in 20 minutes whose the black car was that was parked outside. He repeatedly asked my sister why she wears her watch on her right arm. On top of … Continue reading Repeatedly


July 24th 2021 Today, as I often tend to do, I thought about the Truman Show. I wondered whether, if my life were part of some Truman Show-style experiment, anyone would still be watching. If I were the main character of a manufactured TV show of my life, would the audience have sat and watched me flop around my flat for 12 hours today, mindlessly browsing the Internet and playing Football Manager for hours and hours? Surely today’s viewing figures would have been low. There are aspects, and facets, of my life which would be, I’d imagine, at least somewhat … Continue reading Audience


July 23rd 2021 Today was my sister’s last day as a doctor. Instead of trying to do her justice with a speech of my own, I will let her speak in her own words below. Though what I will say is this: Kirstyn, I am so proud of you. I am proud of you for becoming a doctor, and I am proud of you for deciding to put yourself and your mental health first in deciding to give it up. Here’s what she said: Today I hang up my stethoscope for the final time. After working as a doctor in … Continue reading Stethoscope


July 22nd 2021 Today I’m in the midst of what one might describe as a rut. One might say I’m almost permanently in a rut. One might wonder why one is suddenly writing as if the Queen were reading this. Imagine that. Hi Liz. Just in case. Anyway. I’m not really cooking or cleaning or shaving or running or doing anything much really. Kinda just cba. The only thing I’m really doing with any vigour is working, and even that’s losing purpose. I am filled with boundless demotivation. I am in a rut. Am I not running because I am … Continue reading Midst


July 21st 2021 Today I’m slightly confused because I’ve started wearing shit shirts on video calls and yet I keep being complimented on them?? Mostly, I’m wearing them because they’re flowy and the material is really airy (first time in my life I’ve typed either of those words), and it’s fucking well hot at the moment so I need to wear something that I’m not going to swear through. It’s a bit of a gamble tho because they’re the kind of shirts I’d either wear to a rave, or to a designated shit-shirt night on a lads holiday. And yet, … Continue reading Complimented


July 20th 2021 Today I made a pros and cons list for going into the office to work tomorrow, instead of working from home. Here it is, in alternating fashion: Con: The coffee I have at home is better. Pro: There is aircon at the office. Con: The coffee I have at home is free. Pro: There is aircon at the office. Con: I’d be all alone at work. Pro: There is aircon at the office. Con: It’s a 30 minute drive each way. Pro: There is aircon at the office. Con: I’d have to wake up an hour earlier. … Continue reading Aircon