July 14th 2017

Today Alice replaced a hubcap for me because I’m a mechanically incapable adult human. If you’re feeling a bit of deja vu by reading that, it’s because last week I wrote (here) about how my Grandad had to source new hubcaps for me because I’m a mechanically incapable adult human.

For a week I’ve put off putting them on my tyres, because the first time I tried I couldn’t figure it out and my neighbour was outside and I didn’t want him to see me fail. But, when my Dad told me to bring my hubcaps to golf tomorrow so that he could put them on for me, I decided to give it another shot so that I could impress him when I showed up with four hubcaps.

Except, again, I couldn’t figure it out so I got my girlfriend to do it for me instead. I say that I couldn’t figure it out, but it’s more that I was just a bit freaked out about getting my hands dirty. Literally. The hubcaps were covered in rust (or dirt) so my hands got covered and then I didn’t want to touch anything, but I did stop to take a picture.

Of course.


I reckon with enough time and enough tools I could’ve figured it out. Probably.

I’m only partly kidding, and making light of this situation because I’m feeling slightly emasculated. It’s like that time when she spent three days building my IKEA flatpack desk and I spent three days watching her build my IKEA flatpack desk.

I do know the square root of pi though, so that’s something I’ve got going for me.

To be fair to myself, in the end I’d call it a team effort (Alice wouldn’t agree). She held the hubcap in position and I kicked it in place. She was brains and I was braun, for once.

It shouldn’t be a two-man operation to replace a hubcap. And it shouldn’t take half an hour to replace two of them. But it did. So there.

I don’t think replacing a hubcap even counts as mechanics.

Until tomorrow, it’s just like… a really easy jigsaw puzzle.



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