August 17th 2018

Today I took a bit of time to look after myself. I put a load of washing on. I made an actual dinner for myself. I had a shave. I had a shower. I tried to make myself feel a bit more human. I finished a book that I’ve been reading for weeks. I very nearly got on a train to London.

Remember yesterday when I said that I turned down a trip to London to see my friend, because I’m supposed to be saving money? Well, at about 15:30 today I suddenly changed my mind and decided “Fuck it, I’m going”.

And then I checked the train prices and thought “Never mind I’ll stay here” because they’d gone up threefold in price since yesterday afternoon. That YOLO attitude was empowering for the duration of the three seconds which it lasted. I really wanted to be spontaneous, but in the end, I thought better of it.

So instead, I drove home and vowed to do some of the tasks that I’ve been putting off because I’ve not had the inclination or the motivation recently.

And now I feel a bit better. I do wish I was in London right now, but I have to balance what is good for me with what is sensible.

Until tomorrow, I’m getting there.


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