Condescending

May 17th 2019

Today I took my newfound resolve to stand up for myself perhaps a touch too far.

I was chatting to a guy with whom I work, and — without the boring details — he was trying to find out if something had been done, but I was not the person he should’ve been asking. I’d told him everything I knew, and my entire involvement with the project had at that point been completed. But he kept pushing, and I found the way he spoke to me quite condescending.

So I became perhaps too flippant in my responses, and he evidently picked up on that, and said something like “I don’t like the tone of your voice [young man]“. (I’ve put the “young man” bit in a square parenthetical because although he didn’t actually say that bit, it was sort of implied by his own tone, and it sorta felt like I was being told off.)

So I retorted “Alright Dad” kind of under my breath but also sort of loud enough for him to hear. Unsurprisingly, he didn’t like that and told me to fuck off. Fair. At that point we called it a 1-1 draw and he left the room.

My response was a bit childish, but he was talking to me like a child and not a coworker, and so I guess my “alright Dad” comment was to point that out to him. I’m not overly proud of the whole situation, and would much prefer that it hadn’t happened, but it did, and it was important that I stand my ground and not be spoken to like that.

Of course, you could — completely fairly — say that in giving a childish response I validated his condescending attitude, but to that I’d say that my childish response was to point out his condescending attitude, to which you could say that in giving a childish respo–… and so on ad infinitum.

Nobody comes out of the situation looking particularly good, to be honest, so it’s best everyone just forgets about it.

Until tomorrow, I’m glad it’s Friday.

Jacn

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2 thoughts on “Condescending

  1. I’ve been there and someone actually called me young man in that manner. I told them not to call me young man and, because I was at work and on the phone, of course that call was listened to and I was told off for it. The way I see it – don’t give out bad energy to someone if you’re not prepared to take it. Any time I’ve repeated the same words back to people who’ve tried it with me, they’ve called me rude and been offended. But I’m supposed to take what you’ve said? No.

    /rant over, you’re all good haha

    Like

    1. I totally get you man. And just repeating words to someone is a good way to get them to see how what they said sounded. But most people aren’t sensible enough to notice.

      Like

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