January 4th 2021

Today was my first day back at work after almost 3 weeks off. I won’t lie, I was not thrilled at the idea of being back. My ambivalence was mostly because I wasn’t really “back at work”. I was back at the desk in the spare room of my flat.

Had I have been back at the desk in the office where I work, maybe I’d’ve felt differently. In fact, I’m sure of it.

It’s just super difficult to re-motivate myself while working from home. Usually the first week back in January is difficult anyway, as everyone readjusts to, yknow, not being in their pyjamas with a face full or cheese and biscuits all day every day— but at least when you’re in the office that’s a shared experience. Being around people re-engages me, gets me more interested, reminds me who I am and what my place is in this whole thing.

There are many people with whom I work who are thrilled at being able to work from home all the time, but I am not one of them. I really wish that I was back in the office today. I wish that we all were — for both personal, and professional reasons. Sure, the company is nice, but I just find it so much easier to give a shit when we’re all together.

The current guidance says that we’ll be working from home throughout at least January. Though, the guidance also says that we can work in the office if we need to because we’re either having connection issues or struggling mentally with working from home. I am the latter, but unfortunately my issue is not solved by me just going into the office, I’d need everyone else to be back too, and that’s not going to happen.

And so, here we are. I’m going to do what I can to re-engage. I’m currently being all New Years-y and trying to change who I am as a person in order to deal with some of this, but more on that tomorrow.

Until tomorrow, welcome back.


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