May 12th 2022

Today it’s fine because I don’t even like football anyway. I am strictly a fan and player of golf.

It doesn’t bother me at all that Arsenal got battered in the biggest North London Derby in modern history, because I’d rather play golf anyway, honest.

I am not even slightly upset at the thought that this game could be the difference between Arsenal qualifying for the champions league, or Spurs taking their place, because I’d much rather watch the British Open anyway.

I’m not scared at the thought of playing Newcastle away on Monday without all of our first choice back four, because I’d rather bomb a four iron down the fairway anyway.

Until tomorrow, I’m not even mad bro.


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