Endorphins

November 3rd 2019 Today I marathoned an entire series of a Netflix show. For some reason I woke up ridiculously early even though I’d been drinking last night — plus my body clock is still on BST since the clocks went back — and I had a lot of time to kill before I went out at 2pm. So I watched a ten-episode season of Atypical in a morning/afternoon. It was a throwback to my Uni days where I binged all of Breaking Bad in a fortnight. Life was simpler back then. It’s not so simple any more. As well … Continue reading Endorphins

Reply

October 30th 2019 Today I spent most of my day ignoring my text messages, and avoiding replying. It seems safer that way. By replying you have to commit one way or the other, and so by not replying you are not committing either way, and it’s just easier that way. It’s like Schrodinger’s reply, or something. If the text message remains unread and unreplied to, then the conversation is both dead and alive at the same time. It was a long text message for 7:20am, and I was not fully awake enough to reply to it. And then I had … Continue reading Reply

Proxy

October 29th 2019 Today at work I was asked to do a piece of work that made me feel uncomfortable. And I only realised I was feeling uncomfortable when my boss said “it’s making James feel uncomfortable”. And, like, shit yeah it was. And so when I realised that I tried to unpack it and figure out what was going on, and I realised that it made me uncomfortable because I didn’t back myself to be able to do it. I was in a meeting with my boss, and his boss, and I’d been asked to create a report that … Continue reading Proxy